“Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight, O Lord, my strength and my Redeemer” (Psalm 19:14). This is a well known verse used to conclude prayer sessions in many churches. It was only last week that I paused to consider what I was saying, rather than continuing in mindless repetition. David appears to make a distinction between what is spoken (mouth) and what is unspoken (heart). However, he emphasises that both ought to be acceptable (or, a delight, in the Hebrew) to the Lord.
Transparency with God
2 Corinthians 10:5 states that we should “bring every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ,” that implies that our thoughts aren’t already aligned with Christ. Personally, I would view thoughts and meditation of the heart as interchangeable. This is based on the fact that what I think about may go on to take a special place in my heart (depending on what it is). In addition, I tend to spend a lot of time thinking about the things which occupy my heart.
“Serve Him with a loyal heart and with a willing mind; for the Lord searches all hearts and understands all the intent of the thoughts. If you seek Him, He will be found by you; but if you forsake Him, He will cast you off forever.” (1 Chronicles 28:9)
How many times have you prayed what you thought God wanted to hear, rather than what was truly in your heart at that time? Being fake with someone who knows you for real is pointless. But the fact remains that sometimes you try to hide from God by not being completely honest with Him. In these instances, although you may think the words of your mouth are a delight; your meditations (or thoughts) definitely aren’t. Perhaps this is because you haven’t brought these meditations/thoughts into the obedience of Christ… However, by filtering your thoughts according to Philippians 4:8, and keeping in mind that God can only grant the desires of your heart if they are according to His will (1 John 5:14), you will learn to bring every thought into captivity.
Saying one thing to God and thinking another prevents you from having a true relationship with Him.
Transparency with your Significant Other
I don’t always say what I mean, instead preferring to conceal my inner thoughts and feelings. Bottling things up has been my favourite coping mechanism for such a long time. Therefore, remembering that there’s someone who cares about me, and worries when I’m not ok is one of the hardest things I’ve had to adjust to in our relationship. Although many can be placated with a simple ‘I’m fine’ coupled with a fake smile, he sees right through that. And it’s for this reason that pondering on Psalm 19:14 led me to consider that verse in the context of relationships.
“When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a woman, I put away childish things.” (1 Corinthians 13:11)
The verse above alludes to the fact that there should be ongoing progression/growth in every aspect of our lives. An adult should speak, understand, and think differently to a child. It suddenly dawned on me that unless I put away my childish thinking (e.g. bottling things up), my relationship will suffer. That does not mean that everything I did in my youth warrants change, but rather that I should be reflective and critical of things which may require change. My relationship won’t gain anything by me saying one thing (and secretly thinking another) simply because I choose not to change what I’ve always done.
Honesty and transparency are two underlying principles in Psalm 19:14; both are needed for your relationship with Christ and your significant other.
If your partner isn’t someone you feel safe discussing the ‘words left unspoken,’ then you should address this issue as soon as possible.