Although I wouldn’t want to be single forever, I also hate being in a relationship because of how fragile they can be. Romantic novels and fairy tales seem to portray relationships in terms of passion and excitement. However, human beings lie at the core. Human beings with feelings. Feelings capable of experiencing hurt, grief, and sadness, at the hands of those they love. But also the passion and excitement that overshadow the bleaker emotions. In short, I hate knowing that I have the capacity to hurt someone unintentionally… so alas it feels like the grass is always greener on the other side.
“And the Lord God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.” (Genesis 2:18)
This verse was the beginning of the first ever love story. Although some people really do have the gift of singleness (1 Corinthians 7:7), the vast majority of us don’t. Therefore, God’s statement in Genesis 2:18 implies that our ‘coupled’ state affords us something greater than singleness. In other words, He intended relationships to remedy the loneliness of singleness. Do you know anyone that’s in a bad relationship? Of course the term ‘bad’ is relative; however, we can sometimes see indicators of relationships which cause more harm than good. The point I’m trying to emphasise is that Eve made a positive difference to Adam’s life by fulfilling her role as a helper.
Although we can function as separate individuals for the duration of our lives, there must be a reason why God said it was “not good” for man to be alone.
Perhaps it’s because we can become so comfortable and set in our own ways that it takes a spouse to point out our flaws. ‘Haters’ and enemies will gladly point out your weaknesses, but someone who truly loves you will challenge you to be better. Your significant other should be the medium through which Christ can refine you. I’ll gladly take counsel from anyone whom I believe has my best interests at heart. However, it’s different when it’s in the context of a loving relationship. When my significant other corrects me, I’m more obliged to listen because I know that he’s not just saying it to spite, belittle, or lower my self-esteem. It’s always because he wishes to uphold a Christ-like standard in our relationship.
Every good gift comes from God (James 1:17) and hopefully that should include your significant other. God would not have instituted marriage needlessly. If you can no longer discern any benefits of being in your relationship, then perhaps you have become complacent. Somehow you’re now a couple operating as two single people. Relationships take effort but you should continue to strive until you are one (Genesis 2:24).